Thursday, April 19, 2007

Bars and tone

One time when I was in high school I ruptured my spleen. It sucked. I had to be confined to bed for 3 weeks.Getting out of bed for the first time in three weeks is an adventure, believe me. Severe muscle atrophy would be one of the major setbacks of medically induced comas, but worth it I think (refer to my first post.) Then for another three weeks I was confined to the top floor of my house, no stairs allowed. Actually I guess that it didn't suck that bad. I got to miss six weeks of school and I got to stay up late every night and sit in our massage chair lazy-boy and watch late night TV. I had the late night schedule memorized for most of the channels. Some of the more notable programs were Martha Stewart Living which came on at 3 in the morning followed by The Nanny.

On a side note, the first thing I thought when I saw Fran Drescher in This is Spinal Tap is "Who did she have to sleep with to get that role?" not that she is a poor actress, just that that was the very first thing I thought.

Anyway after the Nanny I guess the network realized it was scraping the bottom of the barrel in television programming, so in order to preserve some sense of decency they just aired two hours of bars and tone before the morning news came on. Yes, good times indeed. I think I enjoy watching television much more when I am taking prescription pain killers. Of course I doubt there are many things I wouldn't enjoy more after a couple of Loritabs (Prescription drug abuse is illegal and morally wrong... and fun. But I don't do it because it is WRONG... and expensive. But the price doesn't make a difference because I wouldn't do it anyway... or would I? No, no I wouldn't.)

Anyway the point of this whole thing which I am getting to is this: Have you ever noticed that late at night they have a lot of commercials and infomercials for mechanical beds? You don't really ever see those on at normal hours of the day. They always say something like "Having trouble sleeping at night?" I imagine most of the poeple who are still awake late enough to see these comercials say something like "No, I am sleeping like a fraking baby. Dip shit."

So... I guess it is smart for the mechanical bed companies to advertise late, because they are hitting their target audience of poeple who can't sleep at night. I just think it is funny. That is all.

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