June showers

So... sometimes when I go to parties I like to take showers. Especially when they are parties at big houses where rich people live. Throughout the years there have been three instances where I have been moved upon to shower during a party. They are as follows:

1. 2002, I had just come from a steamy dance party and I was sweaten heavy. I was at a large house for an end of the year party and I went to the bathroom. While in there I noticed that they had a shower and I thought to myself, five minutes and I could cure my sweatiness. Five minutes later I was fresh as a spring morning and no one ever new the difference.

2. 2007, I was hanging out with my little brother and his friends and we went to a party at a huge house up on the hill. While exploring the house with "Ben" we found a rarely visited wing of the house that had two guest bedrooms next to each other. Each of the bedrooms had bathrooms with showers. If I stood in one and Ben in the other we could talk to each other through the wall. I proposed a race. He accepted. The rules were that you had to wash everything that you normally washed in a shower. He won.

3. Last night, We went to a big party up on the hill next to the university. It was supposed to go until 2 in the morning but it had been shut down by the time when we got there at 1:15. We felt kind of jyped that we missed out on the party so a friend of mine and I went into the house to explore it. It was quite nice, and one thing it had was a bathroom with a large jacuzzi with all sorts of water spouts. We had just been hot tubbing and I wanted to wash off all of the chlorine, so I suggested we take a bath. We disrobed and hopped in. They had this wierd purple protein shampo that I used to wash my hair, and I was pretty happy with the results. After we were done we discovered that there was nothing to towell off with except the hand towell next to the sink and the rug on the floor. I used the handtowell. We were trying to be as quiet as possible but it was difficult to keep from laughing as I dried "myself" off with the handtowell that I imagined someone might be using later. Then we got dressed and raided their freezer for ice cream sandwiches.

If you have never showered at a party, I suggest that you try it. It has been some of the best times that I have ever had at parties.

STOP INTERNET PORNOGRAPHY

Peppermint Patty

So there was this girl that was at my house for a dance party like three months ago. I thought she was way cute so I tried to meet her. Somehow she managed to escape. Then she came back to my house like two other times and I even tried to have one of her friends introduce us but that still somehow failed. I then saw her at a party of a mutual friend and she still managed to evade me.

I was pretty sure that she wasn't avoiding me on purpose, that I just wasn't being forward enough, but then tonight I wet hot tubbing and she was there and I started trying to talk to her again, I had said something to her and she answered me and then all of a sudden this guy sitting next to me butts in with a comment. She looked at him and suddenly said "Hi I'm Emily" So he is there for two minutes and has already accomplished more than I have in three months.

Later I actually said to her "you know I haven't actually met you yet, but I have seen you around a bunch of times"

"Yeah you look familiar" she says, then suddenly she is distracted by someone else and I have still not met her.

Fast forward five minutes and I try again. I had overheard her use the term "Charlie Brown" as a euphemism for I'm not sure what. So I said "What's a Charlie Brown?"

She answered "There are two..." And again she was distracted.

I am beginning to think that her distractions were by choice. So I have still not met her. My goal now is to continue to almost meet her but never actually succeed because the more times it happens the funnier it gets. Well... either that, or I'm going to punch her right in the "Peppermint Patty". The jury's still out on that one.

Saving face

So at this point I would like to apologize for my previous post, I won't delete it cause I like it, but I hope this post will redeem it somewhat. I felt like it was not respectful of sex. Ironically that is probably because I meant everything I said, so it was uncomfortable. Because of that I thought it would be good to share some of my thoughts on sex. SO... Becase making love is the pinnacle of the physical expression of love it should be elevated, it should be made special and sacred. During the act of sexual intercourse we come the closest to God's power that we ever will in life, we actually share in his power to create life. This is probably the most power that we will ever have in this life. So this is another reason it should be made sacred. Also sex is the culmination of powerful spiritual, emotional, and physical feelings that exist between a husband and wife. It unites them in more than one way, and is a way of renewing the promises they make to each other at marriage. So again, even when not procreating, sexual intercourse between a husband and wife should be a special, sacred thing. The more direct meaning we can give sex, by making it truly communitive of emotianal, spiitual, and physical love, the more we will elevate it and make it special and the more pleasure, fullfillment, and security it will give us.

Just joking

So I use the term joking quite often. But for me it usually doesn't mean that what I said wasn't true. It usually means that it was true, but I thouht it was funny enough for me to actually come out and say it aganst my better judgement. Had it not been so funny I wouldn't of said it but I still would have thought it. For instance talking to a freind of mine and for some reason the phrase "I'd totaly do you" came out. And for some reason instead of luaghing it off she was like "wait are you serious?" and all of a sudden I didn't know what to do. Was I serious? I was definitely joking, but does that mean that it wasn't true? Cause I would totaly do her, or at least I would want to but becase I don't believe in premarital sex we would have to be married. So in a way I was totally serious so I wasn't sure if I was joking anymore, then I started feeling awkward. For some reason it is only ok for me to say exactly what I am thinking if people think that it is a joke, which it is, because if it wouldn't have been a joke I wouldn't have said it. Cyclical? Maybe. The important thing to remembner is that if we were marred i would totally do her... hard.

I'm Glad I'm a Boy, I'm Glad I'm a Girl

So I was introduced to my favorite book in a class where my professor was trying to make the point about texts being a relic through which we can study the social atmosphere at the time the text was produced because several prevailing social attitudes will be present in the text. Anyway, that said the reason it is my favorite book is because i think that it is funny. So funny. It is a children's book and it is absolutely sexist. I am not sure if it is trying to make some sort of ironic point or if it is straightforward sexist. I guess you would have to know more about Whitney Darrow Jr. to answer that. I have a digital copy of all of the pages that I got by request from my professor, and one of my good good friends printed it up at Kinko's and made a pseudo book for me for my birthday, so if anyone wants to read it just let me know.

Or you can buy it on the internet for $249.95.

No, for reals that is the going rate. It's not everyday that you find a children's book that has increased in value about 50,000%.

By the way, it is called
I'm Glad I'm a Boy, I'm Glad I'm a Girl.

Pictures

It has been three weeks since my incredible journey. I had some sweet pictures of my sunburned legs and of a rather gnarly blister on my toe but they were taken by my roommate and he refuses to give them to me until I start a blog. This is ironic since I already have a blog and I am actually writing on it right ...now!

That tramp!

So just about an hour ago I was jumping on the trampoline and I landed on my back and one of the springs broke and shot me in the ribs. It hurt. But for some reason it just keeps hurting worse and worse. It wasn't that bad at first but then it slowly started bleeding (yeah that is weird) and now it is getting very swollen and tender. That is all.